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We Bought Our Cave House From A Couple Of Swingers In Spain
Yes you read that correct, we bought out house from a couple of swingers in Spain who were moving back to the UK. This was our lovely little cave house in the back of beyond, in the small village of Cuevas Del Campo, down in Granada.
When we bought this, we viewed 10 or 12 properties between Cuevas Del Campo out as far as Galera. Some of these properties were superb, others not so. This one though, we went back for a second viewing and bought it.
One of the main reasons was it was at the end of a tiny, very private track and not overlooked. The other main reason was it had a pool. Anyway, the couple who were selling, let’s call them Rob and Sue were looking for a quick sale, explained Sues sister was on her last legs and they needed to move back to the UK.
The house was a fair price, so we actually offered the asking price, less a couple of thousand to cover the taxes, in part. All went through quickly and we moved in.
During the first few months there we went to a lunch in Pozo Alcon, down in Jaen which an English woman called Liz organised once a month. At this first lunch we met a lovely lady called Violet who during conversation gave us the name of a reliable builder who specialises in cave houses and cave reforms.
This is how we met Lee and became good friends with him and his family. Anyway, I digress.
Do You Adjust Curtains? Is This A Swingers In Spain Password?
As, I mentioned, we lived at the end of a tiny track, one house at the bottom and around a 90-degree bend up the hill to us and one other house. The couple who owned the other house were in their late 70s or early 80s, and lived in Madrid. The husband had been born and raised in Cuevas Del Campo and he insisted they make the drive down for a week, every year.
A Visitor Calls
So, imagine our surprise one sunny afternoon, when our 3 dogs ( yes we only had 3 at the time ) kicked off barking while laid out in the garden. We had an old cow bell type bell on the wall next to the gate, and someone had rung it. This really was a surprise considering where we lived. Anyway, we went to the gate, opened it and a guy, in his mid to late 60s was stood there. ” Oh, hello, do you adjust curtains? ” he asked.
Well Soph and I kind of looked at each other and Soph said, “Sorry, you must have the wrong house”.
He then said, ” are you house sitting, because Sue adjusts curtains “.
We said sorry, no, we don’t, and after telling him Rob and Sue were living in Wales, off he went, walking down the track.
Second Coming
Now, this chap’s visit was well and truly forgotten about, until 2 or 3 months later we heard a car pull up outside. So, to put this into perspective the track was just wide enough for a transit van to reverse to load and off load furniture when we moved.
To hear a car outside was interesting, as my car was parked out on the verge so there wasn’t any way for this driver to turn around. It was the wrong month for the neighbours from Madrid turning up. We weren’t sure if he had got lost, was following sat nav or what.
Anyway, we went to the gate as the bell had been rung. Soph went to the gate; I went and sat in the garden with the 3 dogs. Well, blow me if I didn’t hear these same words being asked: “Hello, do you adjust curtains? “.
This guy also had no idea that Sue and Rob had moved on, back to the UK.
Fast Forward A Couple Of Weeks
We are in the village, sat outside at one of the bars, and Lee and his wife turned up. They came and joined us and we got into the chit-chat about how the week was going, etc. For some unknown reason, I mentioned this guy calling the other day. I then said the previous guy had asked the same question.
This is when Lee kinda stifled a snigger and said they might have come to enjoy some swinging.
We looked at each other in a ‘ WTAF’ moment.
Lee then went on to tell us they had held swinging parties at the cave house.
” Yeah, yeah,” I said, laughing it off. He then showed me a couple of photos he had been sent on his phone by Sue and Rob. This was of 3 topless women in the pool in the evening.
He went on to explain he was there doing some building work on the cave exterior; she was sunbathing with a female friend. Lee overheard a couple of comments about him, and he was invited to a party. He explained he was married, to which the reply was ‘Great, bring your wife too ‘. Then that evening he was sent a couple of pictures, advised this was from the last party, and they could sleep over if they liked.
Again, I kind of laughed this off and a day later, decided to dig around and found out that they had held swingers parties at the cave and they also ‘rented’ rooms out too from time to time.
Secretive Spain Swingers
So, if you ever get a knock on the door from someone who wants their curtains adjusting and neither you nor your previous house owner were seamstresses, you might just be getting invited to the local Spain swingers get-together.
Needless to say, after googling ” how long does human body fluids remain in water in a swimming pool”, we discovered the chlorine would have neutralised any traces.
Anyway, we resisted putting a large sign on the gate saying ‘No Curtains Adjusted Here’, but we have chuckled about this since.
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